What if my child has difficulty saying good-bye when I leave him?

Many children, especially those three years old and under, have a difficult time leaving their parents. Your child may want to say good-bye several times, or she may cry. Don’t threaten her or say, “Be good and stop crying,” or “Be a big girl.” She needs support, not pressure. You might be able to eliminate some of her anxiety by letting her bring along a favorite toy or blanket. Try arriving at school fifteen minutes early so you can spend more time with her before you go. Or give her a special little treat when she gets in the car, or a “love” note or picture to carry into school with her

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You should not try to sneak out of the school without saying good-bye, even if you think such an action might keep your child from crying. Eventually she’ll notice you’re gone and may become frightened and upset. Although it’s painful to see your child cry as you go, you should still say good bye to her. You might feel better if you wait outside the classroom door, listening for a few minutes until she’s calmed down.

As time goes by, she may continue to have trouble leaving you at the school door. Children two years old and younger don’t understand that you’ll return, no matter how often you tell them. This may make them anxious in the morning, and off and on throughout the day. Consult with your child’s teachers. They may be able to help by giving your child extra comfort and reassurance and getting her involved in activities.